Cosmik Debris lyrics

The Mystery Man came over

and he said, "I'm outta sight!"

He said for a nominal service charge,

I could reach nirvana tonight.

If I was ready, willing and able

to pay him his regular fee,

he would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs

and devote his attention to me.

But I said...

"Look here, brother

Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?

Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?

Look here brother, don't you waste your time on me."

The Mystery Man got nervous

as he fidgeted around a bit,

he reached in the pocket of his mystery robe

and he whipped out a shaving kit.

Now I thought it was a razor

and a can of foaming goo,

But he told me right then when the top popped open,

there was nothin' his box won't do,

with the oil of Aphrodite, and the dust of the Grand Wazoo.

He said "You might not believe this, little fella,

but it'll cure your asthma too."

But I said...

"Look here brother,

Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?

Now what kind of a guru are you?

Look here brother, don't you waste your time on me."

"I've got troubles of my own", I said

"and you can't help me out,

so take your meditations and your preparations

and ram it up your snout!"

"But I got a crystal ball", he said

and he held it to the light,

So I snatched it all away from him,

and I showed him how to do it right.

I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head,

so I looked like I was deep,

I said some Mumbo Jumbos then

and I told him he was going to sleep.

I robbed his rings and pocket watch

and everything else I found

I had that sucker hypnotized

He couldn't even make a sound

I proceeded to tell him his future then

As long as he was hanging around

I said: "The price of meat has just gone up

And your old lady has just gone down... "

Look here, brother

Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?

Now, who you jiving?

Don't you know,

you could make more money as a butcher

So don't you waste your time on me

• Artist:Frank Zappa
• Album:Apostrophe (') (1974)