Harper Valley PTA lyrics

I want to tell you all a story 'bout a Harper Valley widowed wife

who had a teenage daughter who attended Harper Valley Junior High.

Well, her daughter came home one afternoon and didn't even stop to play,

and she said: "Mama, I got a note here from the Harper Valley PTA."

Well, the note said: "Mrs Johnson, you're a wearing your dresses way too high.

It's reported you've been drinking and a running 'round with men and going wild.

And, we don't believe you ought to be a bringing up your little girl this way.

And, it was signed by the secretary, Harper Valley PTA".

Well, it happened that the PTA was gonna meet that very afternoon.

And, they were sure surprised when Mrs Johnson wore her miniskirt into the room.

And, as she walked up to the blackboard, I still recall the words she had to say.

She said, "I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley PTA:

Well, there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there and seven times he's asked me for a date.

And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use a lot-a ice whenever he's away.

And, Mr. Baker, can you tell us why your secretary had to leave this town?

And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep her window shades all pulled completely down?

Well, Mr. Harper couldn't be here 'cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again.

And, if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath, you'll find she's had a little nip of gin.

And then you have the nerve to tell me, you think that as a mother I'm not fit. HA!

Well this is just a little Peyton Place 1 and you're all Harper Valley hypocrites."

No, I wouldn't put you on, because it really did, it happened just this way.

The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA.

The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA.

1. 1956 novel, later adapted into a movie and a TV show, that describes how women are forced to come to terms with their identity, both as women and as sexual beings, in a small, conservative, gossipy town.

• Artist:Martina McBride
• Album:Desperate Housewives soundtrack