Je suis snob [English translation]

I'm a snob... I'm a snob

It's about the only fault I can stomach

It requires months of toil

It's the life of a galley-slave

But when I go out with Hildegarde

It's always me that they're looking at

I'm a snob... a frightful snob

All my friends are snobbish too

We're snobs and we know it

Organdie shirts, shoes made from zebu-hide

An Italian tie and a devilish moth-eaten suit

A ruby on the finger...of your foot, not that one!

Pitch-black nails and a pretty litte handkerchief

I go to the cinema to watch Swedish films

And nip into the cafe to drink whisky galore

I don't have indigestion, nobody does that anymore

I've got an ulcer, it's less common and it's dearer

I'm a snob... I'm a snob

My name's Patrick, but they call me Bob

I go horse-riding every morning

Because I love the smell of fresh manure

I only keep company with baronesses

With surnames like trombones

I'm a snob... an outrageous snob

And when I talk of love

It's stark-naked in the courtyard

We get together with our friends

Every Friday, where we snob it up in style

There's coke, we hate that

And camambert which we eat with a teaspoon

My apartment is truly charming

I heat it with diamonds, you couldn't wish for anything more smoking [fumant= smoky OR fantastic]

I had a TV, but found it tiresome

I've turned it round... from the back it's riveting

I'm snob... I'm a snob

I've been consumed by the bug

I have accidents in Jaguars

I spend the month of August in the sack

It's small details like that

That make you a snob or not

I'm a snob... Even more snobbish than 5 minutes ago

And when I die

I want a shroud from chez Dior

• Artist:Boris Vian