König von Deutschland [English translation]

Every night at half past midnight when the TV hums,

I lie in bed and imagine what it would be like

If I weren't who I am

But chancellor1, emperor, king, or queen

I think to myself, I can do anything Kohl2 can just as well

I'd listen to Vivaldi3 day in, day out

I'd get around, travel to the USA

To bite Ronny's4 calf like a wiener dog5

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

I'd change my crown daily, take a bath twice a day,

Announce the lottery numbers a week early

The only the parades the army would do are hit parades

And every day of the year would be my birthday

There'd only be one program on the TV:

Robert Lembke6, 24 hours a day

I'd have 200 castles and I'd never be broke again

I'd be Rio I, Sissi7 II

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

Socks and cars wouldn't be allowed to stink anymore

I'd start every morning with a glass of champagne

I'd be smarter than Schmidt8 and fatter than Strauß9

And make it big with my records

Reinhard Mey10 would be the Royal Bard

Paola and Kurt Felix11 would be my Swiss Guard12

But before, I'd like to know if they can take a joke,

They'd have to watch their show for 48 hours

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

I'd do all that and much more

If I were King of Germany

1. Chancellor: head of the German government2. Helmut Kohl: then German chancellor3. Antonio Vivaldi: famed Italian composer4. Ronald Reagan: then US president5. "Waldi" is a popular dog name in Germany, especially for wiener dogs6. Robert Lembke: moderator of "Was bin ich?", a popular quiz show at the time7. Sissi: Elisabeth, Empress of Austria and Queen of Hungary, a sort of iconic and often romanticised historical figure8. Helmut Schmidt: former chancellor9. Franz Josef Strauß: then minister president of Bavaria10. Reinhard Mey: popular German singer-songwriter11. Paola and Kurt Felix: moderators of "Verstehen Sie Spaß?" (= Can you take a joke?), a then popular entertainment show about playing practical jokes on people while filming them with a hidden camera12. Swiss Guard: armed force and honour guard tasked with protecting the Pope

• Artist:Rio Reiser
• Album:Rio I