It takes guts for a rock band to put a naked woman on an album cover, because such images become definitive, making it all but impossible to hear the music without thinking of some model's bare ass. Not that such a listener bias would bother San Diego sleaze-rock outfit Louis XIV. The band has been drawing buzz over the past couple of months for its signature song, the low-scraping "Finding Out True Love Is Blind," a string of come-ons to girls of every stripe who might be up for a rough fuck. Extending neo-garage into the glam era, Louis XIV keeps its guitars fuzzy, its beats walloping, and its vocals taunting, while apparently keeping a bevy of willing hand-clappers and cooing female backup singers on retainer.
But Louis XIV doesn't sound as crude as it pretends. The band packs its debut album, The Best Little Secrets Are Kept, with nicely gnarled moments that elevate the songs above dunderheaded cock-rock. The band cranks up the distortion at the end of "Paper Doll" until it swamps the song, and ends "God Killed The Queen" with an unexpected acoustic slide guitar solo. The surprisingly potent, John Lennon-esque "All The Little Pieces" rubs melting strings over clattering percussion, giving a sprightly piano ballad a psychedelic smear. And Jason Hill's foppish chants—in the vein of vocals by Mark E. Smith and Ray Davies—are at their most hilariously ribald on "Illegal Tender" and "Pledge Of Allegiance," where Hill's boasts of sexual prowess are undermined by a fey, faux-British accent.
The most valuable Louis XIV-er is drummer Mark Maigaard, who keeps a syncopated beat while leaving room for magnificently sloppy rolls and fills. While Hill leers coolly, Maigaard gets sweaty, fulfilling the band's lurid promises. The only real problem with Louis XIV—and it's a big one—is that the quickest, dirtiest sex is rarely the most satisfying. It's hard to shake the empty feeling at the end of each these songs; The Best Little Secrets Are Kept has an inescapable, intentional tawdriness. It's a good time, but listeners may want to put on some dark glasses and a raincoat with a turned-up collar before pressing "play."